Category Archives: UFO

Face in Space

squirrel astronaut

Sometimes NASA is just cool.

A couple of years ago they sent a Lunar Reconnaissance Orbiter into orbit around the moon. Included on the craft was a microchip that had the names of anyone who submitted their moniker to the NASA website. I made sure that little chip had my name upon it. Matter of fact, as a tribute to a friend who loved space but was taken too soon by the damned demon that is cancer, we actually filled out the form in his name and gave the certificate to his widow. Stew is still circling the moon as we speak.

I mean heck, we obviously aren’t getting flying cars or living like the Jetsons and jetting off to space anytime soon. I thought that was my one shot at being an astronaut.

Until NOW!

NASA is at it again. This time you can send your pic out into the zero gravity zone on an upcoming launch of the Space Shuttle.

I submitted the pic at the top of this post. See, I was already prepared for my astro moment.

The Face in Space page says:

NASA wants to put a picture of you on one of the two remaining space shuttle missions and launch it into orbit.

(snip)

Return to this site after launch to print your Flight Certificate – a commemorative certificate signed by the Mission Commander.

How cool is that!?!?!

And just know that if my picture sees a UFO while it’s out there, I told it to wave at the little green men and then come back and report to Fox Mulder.

Insurance Adjusters and UFOs

Simon Donohue writes the automobile blog That Petrol Emotion for the Manchester Evening News and offered up a few questions to a claims adjuster about what  insurance companies will or won’t pay for regarding an alien attack on an automobile.

A UFO crashing into a car equals an insurance payout, but if the wreck occurs because of dodging ray blasts from a UFO, that’s not covered.

There are some more odd scenarios on the blog post covering topics like armageddon, animal attacks (not necessarily including the Geico gecko) and frozen blocks of urine falling from airplanes.

Which Witch Flies Over Mexico?

I told you earlier this week the Squirrel Queen loves giant beasts.

I also love a good witch/UFO mystery.

What’s been flying over the Mexican city of Monterey and attacking the local police officers?

Video shot in Mexico in 2006 shows “something” leaping off a cliff and then flying across the void. The Sun has reignited the controversy.

Some are saying it’s a witch. Others are just declaring it an alien cruising around on its version of a scooter.

Judge for yourself, but at least watch the video long enough to see the visibly shaken cops relate their stories. They describe being attacked by some real baddies wearing big pointy hats.

Ahh, it was probably just the ghost of Agnes Moorehead scheming up a new way to bug Derwin or maybe a balloon. Nah, it couldn’t have been a balloon. That’s just too obvious.

I’m sticking with witch.

NASA spreads the Beatles Across the Universe

Did anyone else feel the sudden urge to start humming an old familiar tune early Monday night?

Did thoughts of John, Paul, George and Ringo dance through your noggin and make you gaze up at the stars?

Maybe it’s because last night (Feb. 4, 2008) at 7 p.m. Eastern, NASA beamed a version of the Beatles tune “Across the Universe” into outer space aimed at the North Star to commemorate the 40th anniversary of the lads recording the original version and the 50th anniversary of the founding of both the band and the government organization.

To me maybe one of the most interesting points of the whole NASA press release is the quote by Paul McCartney that was included:

“Send my love to the aliens. All the best, Paul.”

Constantly expanding

If you feel like the recent marketing and fan worship of The Simpsons are inundating your gray matter and leaving it feeling a bit yellow and mushy, here’s some science for you.

With a twist. I mean, come on, it is Eric Idle. Brilliant!

And if you’d like to see more of the fabulous pinball machine pictured above, go here.

Bye bye Bat Boy

The Squirrel Queen is in mourning this week.

I found out the horrible news from Newscoma who heard the word from Cuppa Joe. Drastic news of this sort travels fast, leaving many tears to be shed and cloth to be ripped.

The Weekly World News is shutting down.

A staple of my life for more than two decades, my source for news about Bat Boy, Bigfoot, Alien invasions, the Loch Ness Monster and so much more will no longer ease my passage through the checkout lines in stores. It won’t be there to comfort me as my cheeks adjust to the chill of the cold porcelain. How will I go on?

My love for the rag began so long ago. Working alone late at night at a radio station, I not only read WWN, but I also perused every page of the Memphis Commercial Appeal looking for odd A.P. stories for the radio station’s morning show team to use. There, tucked away at the bottom of a column many pages deep inside the traditional Appeal, I’d find tales of dogs walking hundreds of miles back to their original owners after getting lost during a family vacation or stories of singing birds alerting their owners to a blaze within the home in time to save lives or the odd story about what was recovered from the gastric areas of humans in emergency surgeries just in time to keep them upright and on planet Earth.

Then a few weeks later, I would find many of these same stories inside the WWN acting again as filler between the brilliant Dear Dotty and Ed Anger columns. I would alert people to the veracity of many of the stories inside the grocery store tabloid and would often be scoffed at. But I kept those clippings from the Commercial Appeal and showed the doubters the A.P. evidence. It rarely did much to convince the naysayers.

I even used WWN to decorate my first apartment. It was in an old home that had been split into a duplex, thus we had a long hallway on our side that went basically nowhere. I used headlines and cover art to create a WWN wallpaper, covering the cheap wood paneling with ink about Bigfoot and Bat Boy art all the way up to the molding just below the 10-foot ceiling. It truly was a decorating masterpiece. Martha would have been very proud.

I still have a WWN cover from a few years ago when Bat Boy hunted down Osama Bin Laden. I taped that one to the wall of my office just across from my desk. Whenever I needed writing inspiration, all I had to do was glance up and make eye contact with Bat Boy and the ideas flowed from my fingertips to the keyboard. Magic.

Unlike Newscoma, I never sent in a resume, but it certainly would have been a “dream” job to dream up news of that sort.

Farewell my black-and-white-and-read-all-over friend.

ITISY

Driving along the loop that forms the bypass around Martin, I saw a sight that reminded me of what the Roswell crash site must have looked way back when in New Mexico.

In the median, a mangled barbecue grill lay crumpled and misshapen after flying out of the back end of a speeding pickup truck. The glossy black dome-shaped lid of the grill was dented and warped. Four silver legs glinted in the sunlight like alien landing gear extended to support a vessel from another planet.

Traveling at 65 mph, I was moving too fast to be able to spot any wee, gray aliens with overly large heads strewn in the grass. 

When the highway department picks up this BBQ-UFO, will they take it back to their own version of Area 51 and do some reverse engineering?