Category Archives: greed

Money Makes The World Go Around

The World Wildlife Fund put together this appropo little ditty.

Sure it’s not techco prairie dogs, but what with all the talk about bailouts, I thought this might fit the billions bill today.

Let’s all go out and hug a tree and avoid a crashing elephant or giraffe for that matter.

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Simpsons iPod

I want one NOW!!!!

Please !!!!!

Pretty Please !!!!

They have all varieties from shuffles to touches with three different Simpsons logos etched on.

They’re a bit pricier, but not a ton more than the regular cost and you get your name etched on it.

Cool beans, if you ask me.

Here‘s where you can order one for me.

Go ahead.

I promise I’ll say “Thank you very much.”

Assault with a Frozen Chicken

Here at the Squirrel Queen’s palace, we celebrated Snake Week back in the spring of 2008 when a confluence of reptile stories caught my eye.

Now, it appears 2008 will be the Summer of the Bird. We’ve had chicken bombs, Smoke Monster starlings and territorial blackbirds flying to the forefront.

Now the feathered fever is involving humans.

It seems a man in Detroit attacked his neighbor with frozen chicken parts. The wallop from the 10-pound bag resulted in stitches for the woman. The clucker attack came after the same man stabbed his mother in the neck with a fork. The assaults were the results of his requests for cash being denied.

I’m guessing a man comporting himself in such a manner didn’t say “please” when he requested their money.

Arrests were made and the man is now cooped up.

Justice is served

Read the saga of a missing lawnmower, heroin, signage and payback

recounted by The Trailer Park Refugee.

That’s A Mouthfull

I’ve never had any sort of rodent as a pet. I’m more of a canine person.

But when I ran across this little clip I couldn’t help but giggle at the greedy hamster hoovering up everything in front of it.

This one is for Scout.

Hookers and Skull Bongs – What’s Up With Texas Teens?

Texas teens have gone loco lately. A couple of recent stories involving their misdeeds has the Squirrel Queen scratching her head.

They involve grave robbing, pot smoking, skulls, hookers, Fritos, stolen credit cards and a future career in politics. Wait, maybe it all does add up.

First, the morbid thugs.

Teens in Houston, after getting picked up for a car burglary, went on to confess to a crime so strange even the cops didn’t believe it initially.  The thugs admitted to digging up the corpse of an 11-year-old boy who died in 1921. They took the skull from the body and used it as a bong for their pot-smoking habits.

Then there’s the 13-year-old kid who ordered an extra credit card on his dad’s account. Then proceeds to use the plastic on a $30,000 spending splurge for him and his friends. They bought electronic gadgets and set up shop in a motel room. The kids had plenty of stuff delivered to the room. Snacks like Dr. Pepper, Fritos and Oreos to satisfy their food cravings. They kids also ordered a couple of hookers. Instead of intimate encounters with the rent-a-ladies, the teens just wanted someone to watch them play their video games. I especially enjoyed the part of the story where they claimed they worked for a traveling circus and the hookers had to agree to spend time with them or it would be a violation of some American Disabilities Act sort of legislation. The ringleader of this “marauding” crowd has announced he wants to be a politician when he grows up.

That’s politics in Texas I guess.