Humanzee – Oliver the Chimp

So the dogs woke me up at 3:45 a.m. to go out for a urinary jaunt.

Upon opening the door and getting a face full of cold air as I let them out and back in, I was immediately wide awake.

Trying to find something on the TV to knock me back out again, I watched the end of a MacGyver episode. (For the big finale, he used two silver candlesticks wrapped in bare wires to conduct electricity and defibrillated a man’s heart to bring him back to life. So what did you do at work today? Top that.)

When the mulleted magician was done, I was still wide awake. Surfing the channels, I found a show on the grid entitled “Humanzee” on the Science network. I thought to myself, that will do the trick. I’ll be conked out in 8 minutes.

Instead I was fascinated by the story of this chimpanzee brought from Africa in 1960. It turned out to act differently from all other chimps. Oliver preferred to walk upright. His cranial features were more humanoid than the average Zippy the Chimp. The animal trainers it lived with said it was capable of doing tasks and that other chimps shunned it.

Strange indeed.

At around the age of 16, Oliver’s libido took over and resulted in his being sold by his original owners, beginning an odyssey around the globe. There was talk that Oliver was a hybrid between a chimp and a human.

I still can’t believe I fell back to sleep with this animal mystery on the TV screen, but I did.

So, thanks to Youtube, I tracked down the rest of the episode in six parts.

Here is the first of the videos, so you can see why I wanted to know more.

Oliver image, MacGyver Image, upright Oliver image

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5 responses to “Humanzee – Oliver the Chimp

  1. Oh. my. god. that is the single most fucked up weird thing i ever seed

  2. Dear Ladies and Gentlemen, the film that Roger Patterson and Bob Gimlin made in 1967 in Northern California at Bluff Creek of Bigfoot was real. Here is what they filmed on October 20 1967. Several thousand years ago there were thousands of slaves that ran off around the world and started their own countries. When these slaves ran off there was a large group of men and boys of all different ages and sizes that took off and ended up in Africa. Some of them were giants as tall as 9 ft. or even taller. The giant named Goliath that David killed with his slingshot was 9 ft. tall. So there were giant men in those days. Some of these men and boys went exploring to Borneo and caught female Orangutans and took them to South America and had sex with them and created the Indians. The men and boys that stayed in Africa caught female Gorillas and had sex with them and created the Africans. When scientists found the bones in Africa they thought we evolved naturally from a female Chimpanzee. But it wasn’t a natural evolution it was a man made evolution. That’s where all the Bigfoot and Orangutan creatures come from. They are half man and half Gorilla and half man and half Orangutan. They use to call the Indians the red man. The Orangutan has reddish hair. When those men bred out the hair the Indian’s skin remained red. The Gorilla has black hair and skin. When those men bred out the hair the African’s skin remained black. Some of the Indians and Africans are tall. And some of the Bigfoot and Orangutan creatures are tall. They are tall because some of the men that created them were tall. Some scientists believe that we evolved naturally from a female Chimpanzee. Have you ever seen an 8 ft. tall Chimpanzee? I haven’t either. Bigfoot migrated up through Africa and came into the United States at the top of Africa when they were connected by land. The Orangutan creatures migrated up through Central America and came into the United States like the Indians did. The creature that Roger Patterson and Bob Gimlin filmed in 1967 was half man and half Gorilla. It was a female Bigfoot that they named Patty. Patty was not a man in a costume, she is not our missing link and she is not a figment of our imagination. Patty was a creature that was created by men that had sex with female Gorillas and Orangutans a long time ago. Believe it or not, man created his own evolution.

  3. The notes above do capture much of Oliver’s public life, but only those elements specifically created by the government to gather open attention. There is much more to the story.

    Hello. I am an older gentlemen now and while I prefer to stay in the shadows, my failing health and age continue to reduce the potential for reprecussions.

    In the middle 70s, I ran an elite aviation/aerospace group in southern California for a little known agency. Located in the town of Upland, my team was quartered at a small private airfield called Cable. Our public front was that of a civilian aviation patrol club, ostensibly formed to conduct pilot training and air search, etc.

    In the spring of 76, I was contacted through my channels and instructed to perform support assistance for what was then termed Operation BAKER BREAD. In short course, my team Squadron Two Five received ample funding, and received a liaison visit from the Op Controller who was known to me only as Richard. I meet with him in a small place on the Foothill Blvd., the Upper Crust, where I received my general tasking: design and test flight control and operating modules that could be understood and used by a chimp. According to Richard, the protocol was established as a Hot Sheet item, the desire being to preclude any further incident such as that which had befallen Gary Powers.

    Over the months, my team commenced design and prototyping in a private hangar at Cable (N 2-4). We installed the controls and surrogate lifting surfaces onto a sled of sorts in order to permit a controlled examination of the operations without flight risk. In the fall of the year, I first met Oliver.

    One our introduction, he merely strolled into our quonset hut, touched two fingers to his right brow without breaking gait, and helped himself to my package of Camel cigarettes. I was simply astonished. I had been working on a personal device, a machine designed to clean and polish Golf balls, that I intended to market to luxory hotels. Within several hours, Oliver had become familiar enough with the machine to safely operate it – he even adjusted a troublesome switch for the ejection/removal.

    Over the winter months, we began testing our monkey piloted rocket sled. These tests occured far out in the desert; you may still visit the area now by driving 90 or so miles east of a small town called Halloran Springs. While the mechanical testing went well, I began to see the ugly side of Oliver – a side that perplexed and frightened me. A chronic smoker, he would slip into despondant periods during which he would drink alcohol heavily and show aggressive behavior. Several instances nearly shut down the project; one involved his brandishing an empty bottle and striking an assistant (it was poor old man Miller) over the head, apparently to take possession of his felt hat. As Miller lie in the sand, unconcious, I observed Oliver to exhault in the moment, wavering both limbs wildly and flashing his teeth while hooting. He wore the hat for several days, then filled it with his own urine and left it.

    Still more troubling was his untoward sexual conduct. In another incident, a young support staff worker, Patty, fled the camp in a rush and did not return the following week. Months later I was to learn that Oliver had attacked her sexually, and that their union had in fact resulted in pregnancy. Richard arrived to discuss the matter and here revealed that Oliver was, indeed, a hybrid simian. Attempts to breed him to human females had taken place, with those results being termed horrible “pirates and ringmasters”. I learned only later that Patty had been spirited off from the area in order to deliver the offspring of Oliver. I was only to glad when testing was complete. I never heard another word regarding the Op or of Oliver until recently. The recent spate of news makes me wonder if it is all timed to coincide with the progeny of Oliver.

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